Showing posts with label stripclub. Show all posts
Showing posts with label stripclub. Show all posts

Sunday, September 19, 2010


The other night I go out with a few friends to a local club for the club's 26th birthday party. It was free cover with a invitation and free drinks till 10 pm. Unfortunately we did not make it before 10 pm, so no free drinks were consumed. We stayed there for a bit but left since partying with thousands was kinda lame that night as the place was filled with more sausage than an Oscar Meyer hot dog factory.

But the night did not end there. No sirree Bob.

We decided to go to one of the counties more upscale adult establishments.

That's right...a strip club.

There were some people there that night that my friend knew and were cool people. Cool, as in the one guy bought everyone drinks for the night and even breakfast afterward, but I am getting ahead of myself there.

Now, I have been to a strip club on occasion once or twice. Sometimes spending money I should not have and times spending no money at all. When I do buy; especially in the form of entertainment, I do not try and dicker the price down or get freebies from the ladies like a buddy of mine does, just doesn't seem right. I'm not buying a used car, just a dance.

So the money-man, decides to buy me a lap dance and for me to pick out a girl. I am a really picky person in this department, since you will be looking at the girl for a little bit of time and you do want one that can at least move. The group starts picking out girls, which puts me on the spot and forcing a decision that I am always incapable or ill-equipped to dealing with, so after a few being pointed out and nodded off, a striking specimen walks by, pointed out and I accept. Mostly I accept for the reason to end this quickly, the whole center of attention thing that I don't like and all, but she did catch my attention as she was olive skinned.

Now let me tell you this, I like certain features of a woman to be a certain way. I like redheads, olive skinned or pacific islander or latinas, pale blue eyes and for them to be proportionate in body, meaning a certain hip to breast ratio.

I did mention I'm picky, right?

For the few seconds I was able to check this girl, it was the skin color that caught me and forced my decision. She had another dance lined up so I had to wait for a little bit, which means I get some other dudes sloppy seconds of a sort. While waiting, I started thinking that she looked familiar.

Well, once we got to the back, we started talking. Standard stripper-client small talk before the next song. "From here? Go to school here? Age?" Were all asked and we both are about the same age; me 32, her 32 in Oct.; both went to the same high school and were both in band at the same time for two years.

Yep, I got a lap dance from a former classmate. Is that a faux pas?

Anyways, she is not your standard local stripper, with a bunch of tats, drug addiction; that I'm aware of or babies to feed nor working through college. Since she is a model, has some houses almost paid for and has several degrees from an Italian college that she paid cash to go to.

All for being a high school drop out.

While I have a Jeep that isn't working, a job that barely pays the bills in the winter and a bike.

Perhaps I should start stripping, seems to pay well.

Sunday, February 7, 2010

Dream II

I dream.

Honestly, I do.

I'm not talking about daydreaming here, but those dreams you dream at night; before the cookie monster comes out of the closet.

Not to dismiss daydreams; they are all great and stuff, but not the topic at this moment.

The other night I had a dream and not one about equal rights or of genie but of zombies. Yes, I know a bit odd, but I can't help what I dreamed.

The dream started shortly after a zombie infection started to run rampant and the survivors had just fought off the first wave of zombies that came around with the normal means of disposing of the undead. You know, guns, blunt weapons, cars, fire or anything you can get your paws on to fend off the unrelenting brain eaters.

Somehow this sideshow of a dream ended up in a strip club, with people dressed in colored leather outfits and one particular fellow that wore a purple one that had long pig-tailed leather whips attached to the head piece.

Yes. Odd, to say the least.

I should also add that he sounded like Eddie Izzard.

Now I don't know what caused such a dream to manifest since I didn't see anything with zombies in it recently, nor have I partaken in any stripclubs with purple leather wearing Eddie Izzard sounding persons, nor did I watch an Eddie Izzard comedy special on the tele.

I don't really understand the dream, but I survived, and the purple leather fellow can do a mean clean up job with the head whips on a horde of zombies.

Before you ask; yes, I do dream in color and do hear sound in my dreams.

So be jealous.