Twelve Days of Christmas

On the first day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
A partridge in a pear tree.

*sigh* Seems my true love must think I need to go on a diet.

On the second day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Two turtle doves,

Must be the new avian diet that is all the rage.

On the third day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Three French hens,

Yep, must be.

On the fourth day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Four calling birds,

Most definitely.

On the fifth day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Five golden rings,

But where is the one ring to rule them all?

On the sixth day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Six geese a-laying,

Lazy geese. Or are these horny geese?

On the seventh day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Seven swans a-swimming,

Anybody want some birds, I have plenty.

On the eighth day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Eight maids a-milking,

Oh? Heeeyyyyy!!!! I got some milking needing done. Hee Hee.

On the ninth day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Nine ladies dancing,

YES!!! This is starting to look good. Where my dollars at?

On the tenth day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Ten lords a-leaping,

What? Wait…where the dancing ladies go? BRING THEM BACK!!!!

On the eleventh day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Eleven pipers piping,

I’m all about music appreciation but you’d think my baby would have hired some talent.

On the twelfth day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Twelve drummers drumming,

I’m getting a headache. Make it stop. Please.

Well, I have plenty of food, dancing ladies and music for a bachelor party, as well as lords for a bachelorette party. There is New Years coming up so looks like a kick ass party going on.

Side note: Since I own people, does that make me some sort of slave owner now? Am I gonna have marches and Jesse Jackson camping out on my yard?


I think I may have to re-think this ‘true love’ thing, seems my baby has set me up. Must be payback for forgetting her birthday.